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We all want love. We all want to feel needed, nurtured and cared for. We also want to
give love and nurture others. Sometimes, this desire for a romantic relationship
becomes unhealthy, even toxic. How do we know when our desire for happily ever
after has become all-consuming, addictive? And when we are aware of the addictive
nature of the relationship, what do we do?
Are You Addicted To Your Relationship?
Relationships can act in the same ways as drugs and alcohol. We can use
relationships to make us happy and fill the emptiness we feel in our lives. If your
relationship is physically or emotionally abusive, but you find yourself constantly
trying to...
Relationship Strategy No.1: Appreciate your Partners Differences - Due to your upbringing, family background, cultural heritage and psychological makeup, you and your partner approach life from completely different perspectives. - By accepting that fact, you can begin to appreciate the value that your partner brings to the relationship. A balanced relationship requires Ying and Yang, the male and the female to flourish. Differing viewpoints make for a rich and rewarding relationship. Relationship Strategy No.2: Understand the Nature of Love - Has the hot, heady romantic passion subsided in your relationship? Has the infatuation faded? Good! Now you are ready to move on to...
by Kevin Skinner PhD www.datingsmarts.com Intelligence comes in many forms. In spite of this, however, our society focuses almost exclusively on academic intelligence. Think about it. When is the last time someone said, “John has really high relationship intelligence. He has a skill for listening and understanding people. He must have a relationship IQ of 160.” We focus so much on educational intelligence that we have neglected to teach people about critical elements that make relationships successful. Focusing on traditional intelligence quotients overlooks the reality that a “successful” person with an IQ of 150 could be completely unsuccessful at relationships. I believe it is time...
There is evidence that people with a strong support network are healthier. So, how can we tell if our relationship is a healthy one? I think that there are five main areas to look at communication, respect, trust, responsibility and care.
Communication The best way to tell if your relationship is a healthy one is by asking yourself, "How easy it is to talk to my partner, and how honest can I be with him/her?" Finding the time to talk, being as open as you can, listening to the whole message and being able to work out disagreements are all signs that you are in a healthy relationship.
Respect A healthy relationship is one in which both partners treat each other with respect. Listening to each other’s views and opinions are ways of showing respect. This includes sharing parental responsibilities, making family decisions together and mutually agreeing on a fair distribution of work.
Even in a healthy relationship arguments will happen because we all come from different family backgrounds and have different family traditions, life experience and opinions. Because we respect each other, we sort out arguments by coming to a solution that we are both happy with.
No one is right or wrong all the time, and in a healthy relationship mistakes are acknowledged and accepted.
Trust Although trust takes time and effort to build up, it can be destroyed in an instant. Being honest with each other and being able to speak the truth without fear is a crucial part of a successful and healthy relationship.
For a relationship to be healthy, both of you need to believe in it and actively be helping to build it up.
Responsibility Both partners need to accept responsibility. Each consider various aspects before deciding and acting, protecting each other from harm and not blaming each other when things don’t go right.
Taking Care of Yourself It is important to remember that a relationship contains two individuals, and both people will be able to take care of themselves in a healthy relationship. Each will have time and space to do the things they want to do, with the support of their partner.
In a healthy relationship the goal is for both partners to win.
About the Author Copyright Andrea Sheehy 2005. All rights reserved. Andrea Sheehy is qualified and experienecd couple and relationship counsellor. For more information about couple counselling visit her website:http://www.andrea-sheehy.com/
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On a piece of paper, in a notebook or in your journal answer the following series of questions. Do this to learn about yourself and your relationship, but you can also suggest that your partner do the same. You can do this on a yearly basis, say January 1st every year. Exercise Number 1 Do you recall the beginning of your relationship, when you first fell in love? Describe your behavior. Describe your partner's behavior. Too often in a long-term relationship partners stop the very behaviors that connected them with one another in the first place, but transcendent reality. Some common examples are: Do you remember looking deeply into one another's eyes? Do you remember how easy concentrated attention was? Do you remember those compliments and gifts, etc.? What do you do that is the same? What do you no longer do? What has your partner stopped doing? What behaviors would you like to restore to your relationship? Exercise Number 2 What behaviors bother you most about your partner? Are these issues similar to issues from your past? If so, what part do you play in implanting the negative behaviors in your partner? How could you change your behavior to encourage a more positive response? Copyright 2005 Linda Miles Ph.D About the Author Author, Dr. Linda Miles, is deeply committed to helping individuals and couples achieve rewarding relationships. She co-authored an award-winning book, The New Marriage: Transcending the Happily-Ever-After Myth, and CD's, The Train Your Brain series. http://www.drlindamiles.com...
Chicago Daily Herald - Found 5 hours ago Local romance writers Tracey Devlyn and Adrienne Giordano had long talked about visiting Lady Janes Salon, a Manhattan-based gathering in which
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